About the sense of solitude, not as an individual but as a culture
(Versión en español al final, después del texto en inglés. Spanish version available at the end of the English text).
People ask me, usually shyly, what language we speak in Colombia. The question unsettles me: it stings, sometimes it even offends. And yet, I often find myself enjoying it, as it reminds me I’m far from home.
In London, the narratives I grew up with seem less relevant. My friends’ needs, my family’s goals, the concerns I brought from Colombia, they all feel lighter here. Almost trivial. I often feel it during conversations, and I see it when people from other continents try to speak.
I’m learning that what we call ‘global culture’ ends up being a one-sided export; a wide, ever-flowing bridge that allows passage in only one direction. We need common ground to be understood: references, stories, symbols we share with the person we’re speaking to. But when all those references belong entirely to someone else, we’re no longer speaking as equals. Imagine trying to talk about heroism, but having to rely solely on North American stories, because those are the main ones that have crossed the bridge in the last decades.
As a foreigner you might feel that you have an opportunity to lay your cards on the table and share your national stories. And it might work a couple of times, but the less prominent the culture, the harder it becomes to sustain this in the long run. Translating too often becomes tiring for both the speaker and the audience.
I had the opportunity to ask for advice on my first week in London to a priest, after talking a while I told him to give me any tips so I can adapt easier to his culture. He simply said: “It is rather improper to speak of your country unless one is asked”.
It’s not just about explaining a reference, but about the other person recognizing it, almost physically, as valuable. And that’s hard to achieve when Colombian references are barely accessible outside Latin America. “What language do you speak in your country?” Eventually, you give up. However beautiful the reference, however relevant the example, it would demand too much: too much context, too much thinking, too many words. And so, you leave it unspoken and remain in silence while the other person keeps talking, unaware of what they just missed.
My discomfort is heavily influenced by the work of George Lakoff, who explores how metaphors and frames shape the way we think and communicate, particularly in politics and public discourse. In this case, I see references, stories, as a form of framing.
“Frames are mental structures that shape the way we see the world. As a result, they shape the goals we seek, the plans we make, the way we act, and what counts as a good or bad outcome of our actions. In politics our frames shape our social policies and the institutions we form to carry out policies. To change our frames is to change all of this. Reframing is social change.”1
The noise of narcos, hypersexualization, violence, and most of all, complete ignorance about Colombia, drowns out other stories. It affects not only our global image, but also our quality of life. Additionally, writing about Colombia isn’t easy either, since it’s a complex country in many ways.
“(…) Colombia does not fit the stereotypes and “models” conventionally used in discussions of Latin America.
After all, what is a Latin Americanist to do with a country where military dictators are almost unknown, the political left has been congenitally weak, and such phenomena as urbanization and industrialization never spawned a “populist” movement of lasting consequence?”.2
That same author later points out one of the main findings one makes when researching Colombia: paradoxically, a lack of national identity is one of the traits that most defines us.
“It is thus a commonplace to say (with Colombians often saying first and loudest) that the country lacks a true national identity or a proper spirit of nationalism, at least as compared to most of its Latin American neighbors. Indeed, hyperbolic nationalism is not common in Colombia”.3
It makes sense, our territory is made up of six regions that could easily be six different countries4. The Amazonian region, for instance, is larger than all of Italy5. The Pacific, roughly the size of Andalusia, is populated almost entirely by black people6. The Andean region, split into three mountain ranges, holds valleys so wide and flat that they feel like one is at a sea level savanna. Bogotá was built in one of them, in the heights of 2,600 meters.
Less than one third of Colombia’s borders touches the sea. Technically, you could walk its entire continental coastline: from the southern edge on the Pacific, up to the northern tip of the Atlantic. But that journey is about the same length as walking from London to Athens, and driving is not feasible as much of it is dense tropical jungle.
Though we are neither an island nor a peninsula, Colombia boasts more coastline than the entire Great Britain. And yet, due to the dense mountain range, it’s still common to meet people who’ve never met the sea.
Six different countries forced to live as one. Many African nations face a more deeply rooted version of this challenge today.
Coming back, my interest lies in making Colombian stories more visible. Promoting tourism doesn’t excite me, nor does building a national brand. I’m not interested in fueling nationalism either. So why, then, do I want to share these stories?
I think it stems from the anticlimactic sting of not being able to share something that thrills you: to experience, to discover, and to be unheard. A perfect example of this is José Arcadio Buendía, who living in an isolated Caribbean village, and playing for months with Portuguese maps and Gypsy sextants, one day realized that the earth was round as an orange. Yet, in that moment of discovery, he had no one to share it with. He lived in a house full of people.
“He spent several days as if he were bewitched, softly repeating to himself a string of fearful conjectures without giving credit to his own understanding. Finally, one Tuesday in December, at lunchtime, all at once he released the whole weight of his torment. (…) devastated by his prolonged vigil and by the wrath of his imagination, revealed his discovery to them:
“The earth is round, like an orange.”
Úrsula lost her patience. “If you have to go crazy, please go crazy all by yourself!” she shouted. “But don’t try to put your gypsy ideas into the heads of the children.” José Arcadio Buendía, impassive, did not let himself be frightened by the desperation of his wife, who, in a seizure of rage, mashed the astrolabe against the floor”.7
Solitude reveals itself, also, when the noise of exoticism blurs the message. When a Latino shares a sad Salsa song with a gringo, and in response, they say “Caliente” while exaggeratedly dancing their shoulders. The fast-paced instruments and their unfamiliarity with Spanish keep them from feeling the nostalgic vibe. It’s a tragedy. One cannot truly understand half of Salsa without feeling its melancholy.
Yet, we Colombians are not alone in our solitude, nor are we innocent. A Chinese friend tries to talk to me about “clans,” and all I hear is “families.” Someone explains Ramadan to me, and all I can see in the meantime is someone who hasn’t drunk water while the sun is up. Better shut up. At that moment, every word pierces.
If a non-Spanish speaker feels curious and reads about Colombia today, they might encounter a warped picture compared to what’s available in my language. The English literature on the topic is limited8, yet people here feel entitled to an opinion after reading just a couple of papers. The problem is clear. I believe that facilitating and sharing stories is one way to address it.
It is also a matter of sovereignty. Can stories alone change a country’s politics? I doubt it, but I’m sure it’s a necessary step. I believe that one cannot gain autonomy while pursuing the dreams of others. Stories, as frames, shape our goals, and for decades in Colombia, we’ve pursued projects conceived in other climates.
I started this text by talking about how I feel triggered when people don’t know what language I speak. Nonsense. Did I know about the largest Muslim population in the world living in Indonesia? Was I aware of the difference between Farsi and Arabic? Had I ever heard of the Chinese-Portuguese colonies in Macau? Becoming aware of my own ignorance pushes me to set aside provincialism and not feel offended easily. Far from home, nothing is obvious, and there’s a lot to tell.
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- Lakoff, G., 2004. Don’t think of an elephant!: Know your values and frame the debate. White River Junction, VT: Chelsea Green Publishing. ↩︎
- Bushnell, D., 1993. The making of modern Colombia: a nation in spite of itself. Berkeley: University of California Press. ↩︎
- Bushnell, D., 1993. The making of modern Colombia: a nation in spite of itself. Berkeley: University of California Press. ↩︎
- The regions are: Amazonía, Andean, Caribbean, Insular, Orinoquía, and Pacific. ↩︎
- The area of Italy is 302,073 km², while the Colombian Amazon covers 483,119 km² ↩︎
- According to the researcher Eduardo Restrepo, 96% of the Pacific population is Black, though the source of this figure is not clear. On the other hand, the Truth Commission, a government body, states that at least 80% of the population in the region is Black. Restrepo, E. (n.d.). The Pacific Population: Context, Identity, and Rights. Retrieved from https://www.aacademica.org/eduardo.restrepo/34.pdf.
Comisión de la Verdad, (n.d.). Retrieved from https://web.comisiondelaverdad.co/en-los-territorios/despliegueterritorial/pacifico#:~:text=Poblaci%C3%B3n%3A%201.5%20millones%20de%20personas,que%20suman%20700%20mil%20habitantes.
↩︎ - García Márquez, G., 1967. Cien años de soledad. Buenos Aires: Editorial Sudamericana. ↩︎
- Until 1994 there was only one book in English on Colombian history: “with the exception of the Historia de Colombia de Henao y Arrubla, translated into English by J.Fred Rippy and published in 1938, there was no such work in that language”. Bushnell, D., 1993. The making of modern Colombia: a nation in spite of itself. Berkeley: University of California Press. ↩︎